http://my.hsj.org/Portals/2/logos/__TFMF_514bnj55plceyobq3pxpgd55_85d01ca1-7c67-49bd-a7dc-3f3809fdd95c_0___Selected.jpg en-us Copyright 2008 - All Rights Reserved. Mon, 23 Nov 2009 22:37:07 GMT 15 By Corinne Handy
Running Sucks: Week One             So I’m fat. It’s always been an issue for me, ever since second grade. I’ve been battling my weight since basically forever and went on my first diet in the third grade, when my doctor recommended I go on Weight Watchers. Since then, I have probably lost around 50 pounds, all spread out over the course of those eight years and separated by periods of intense weight gain.             So I’m sick of it. I’m going to beat this. I have an immense knowledge of all things related to weight loss, and I am finally going to put it to use. I’m hoping that by writing this article every week that I will be far more afraid of embarrassment than I ever was interested in food, and uninterested in exercise, and while I’m at it, maybe inspire others out there who have the same difficulties with weight as me.          It’s sad, really, that it has to take something as extreme as this to get me to change, sort of like those people who go on The Biggest Loser, but hey, whatever works works. And it is working. I’m terrified. And right about now I really DON’T want those brownies sitting on the stove. I think I’ll go for a jog.   Running Sucks: Week Two             Whew! How the time doesn’t fly! Well, at least when you’re dieting, that is. I have successfully made it through week one of my quest for health and I have to say, I’m feeling pretty good. I’m down a whole 3 pounds! It’s been hard, but they say that the first week’s always the hardest, so hopefully it will just get easier from here.             I started out the week with a little visit to the grocery store with my mom, to stock up on healthy food (which sadly, my kitchen is severely lacking in). It was pretty eye opening, honestly. Did you know that healthy food is like, twice as expensive as regular junk? And it expires. Fast. You’d be surprised at how long a bag of Cheetos can go before it gives you salmonella. But overall, the food isn’t too bad. Definitely nothing like a Hershey bar, but hey, whatever it takes, right?             Next, I was introduced to our treadmill. Our rusty, dusty, out of date, 12 year old treadmill. Yeah, I didn’t know they had treadmills in the Stone Age either. I walked a good hour or so, and afterwards I stretched. It felt good! I was exercising! It was fun! A couple days of this and I’d be the definition of hard-core….or so I thought.             As it turns out, when you first start exercising you have this thing called “energy” built up in your system from 16 years of being a class-A slug. So after two days, I was tired, and sore, and really not so into exercising as I had previously been. And when you’re listening to your iPod for an hour straight, you quickly learn that there are only about 20 good exercising songs, and they get reeeally old reeeally fast. So I was in a funk. It really is a lot easier to be lazy.             In the end, I just had to suck it up and deal with it. We’re not getting a new treadmill, I’m not getting any new songs, and exercising is probably not going to get any easier. Hershey’s will continue to be unhealthy, and my mother will continue to make brownies for the rest of the family, leaving me with nothing to satisfy my cravings but a carrot stick. And I will continue to be fat unless I do just that. Suck it up and stuff my face with carrot sticks. Let the stuffing begin.   Running Sucks: Week Three             As week two comes to a close, I am now a whole seven pounds under what I started out as. That’s right; I have lost seven pounds in two weeks! As exciting as this all is, it’s hard to be completely happy about it because I have come to realize something during the now many hours I have to think whilst on the treadmill. In all my years of dieting, there has been a steady pattern: Lose weight, and then gain it all back…plus more.         The thing is, if I diet, I generally don’t have a problem losing weight, at least that first ten or fifteen pounds. But if I stray from my diet even a little or don’t exercise for a day, then I am sure to gain weight. Not just fail to loose or stay the same weight, but gain . I have talked to my mom many times about this and we have come to the conclusion that I just need to be an active person. My whole life. Otherwise, I fear I am doomed to end up a six hundred pound lonely cat lady who goes on those “half ton man” shows on TLC. And I pretty much don’t want that.             Anyways, since I’ve been dieting, I have noticed something really interesting. Healthy food, good dieting food, is either hot or cold. There really is no in between, room temperature food (besides granola and things to that effect) that could be considered “healthy”.  For example, I usually have deli meat, cheese, and a fruit for lunch. When I get home, I have something like soup, or a rice casserole or something. Salads, veggies, water, all cold. Soup, casserole, frozen “Healthy Foods” dinners, all hot. Chips, cupcakes, desserts, chocolate, all room temperature. Do you see a pattern here?         I don’t know. Maybe I’m going crazy, which, honestly, is entirely possible. With this new lifestyle, it definitely feels like I’m going crazy. At this rate, I’ll have lost it by the time I’m 20….but at least I’ll be a skinny crazy person.   Running Sucks: Week Four             Man I hate those Girl Scouts. Seriously, why can’t they sell Girl Scouts celery or Girl Scouts watermelon? Why do they have to make those blasted Caramel Delights that are basically the most amazing God-given food ever to grace the earth? I’ll tell you why. Because they’re counting on people like me, like my family, who simply can’t resist buying ten thousand boxes every time any of them says, in that ever so sweet ten year old voice, “Would you like to buy some Girl Scout cookies?” These heinous devil’s advocates can be found at every Albertson’s, Von’s, Smith’s, you name it. There’s no getting away from them!             Unfortunately for me, one of my friends happens to be a Girl Scout. And not just any Girl Scout. The Girl Scout. She has every badge. She has been in Girl Scouts since the womb, and her mom is a leader. I mean, the girl lives and breathes Girl Scouts. So, naturally, when she asked that dreaded question (see previous paragraph), I had no choice but to buy two boxes of Caramel Delights. Now, back when I ordered them, I was not on a diet. When I started my diet, I still don’t think I understood the pain that would be caused when those cookies arrived. “They’re just cookies,” I said (oh, the naiveté!), “I can handle it.”             Wrong! As soon as she handed me my order, I knew I was in for a world of hurt. It was like I was carrying a bomb in my hand, waiting for the right moment to blow up when I got home and the vultures came after them. The weight of those cookies plagued me all day until I finally got home.         “Sooo….I got the cookies today…” I said as I walked through the door. Next thing I knew, there was a swish, a crinkle, a blur, a gulp, and my brother had inhaled the entire box. The whole thing! I was mad, but also relieved. I went upstairs to do my homework for a couple hours, to pass the time, and by the time I came back down, the second box was taken care of. So all that worry for nothing! I can always count on my family to support me. No matter what. ….well, as long as supporting me means eating.   Running Sucks: Week Five So I think I’ve hit a plateau. As of my last report, I had lost seven pounds. In two weeks, I have lost another pound. So total, in 4 weeks, I have lost eight pounds. That’s great! Really, it is! The only issue I have with it is that I lost so much the first and second week, but then these last two weeks, I have lost half a pound a week. I don’t understand it.             The thing is, I haven’t done anything different! I haven’t done anything wrong! I haven’t been cheating on my diet and I’m still exercising every day. I talked to my mom about this and she used that word “plateau.” What is a plateau? Well, according to my mother, it’s where you stop losing weight for a period of time. She thinks that the first two weeks I was just loosing water weight. And now I’ve “plateau”d.             So I guess that can offer me some sort of comfort. If what my mom says is true, I should start losing again pretty soon. It’s just so frustrating! I want to get to my goal weight now. And although I know that is totally unrealistic, I fear that if it takes too long for me to lose it, I’ll give up before I do. I’ve just lived that nightmare too many times. You start off strong, doing everything perfectly, and then poof. You’ve lost it. And by ”it”, I mean the drive to continue loosing the weight.             So it sucks. Just as running does. Maybe I should just name this one “plateauing sucks” and my other one “girl’s scouts suck”. But really, everything in losing weight sucks. Dieting sucks. Running sucks. Temptation sucks. The only thing that doesn’t suck is when you step onto that scale after a week of hard work and it finally pays off. You’ve lost it. Even if it’s only half a pound, it’s worth it.   Running Sucks: Week Six             You know, it gets easier every week to write this column. I now have more experiences under my belt, more tales to tell, more frustrations to vent about, and more “inspiration” to give. But the main reason why it is so easy for me to write this column, I think, is because every class I come in here (the journalism room) and there is some sort of delicious treat that I can’t have. Pizza, cookies, chips; you name it, are constantly mocking and starting at me when I come into this class. “Cori….eat me….I said Cori…eat me….CORI!! EAT ME!!!!” is their constant cry, the noise I live with every day, the awful temptation plaguing my every waking moment.             So, needless to say, I have plenty of things compelling me in writing this column. For one, this is a huge part of my motivation. Every time I see one of those pizzas or run into one of those heinous Girl Scouts, I just remind myself that I have a duty to my readers to keep it real. If I am constantly cheating on my diet, then I’ll have nothing to write about, unless I make something up, which I would never do. And it’s okay! Those cookies and pizza will still be there in six months when I hit my goal weight! And although I won’t be going back completely to my old ways, I can still have a cookie here, or a slice of pizza there. In six months. That’s not a huge amount of time.         It actually has gotten easier, though. For one thing, my older brother (the most fitness-oriented member of my family, by far) has finally recovered from his back surgery. He can now go back to working out like he used to, and is also trying to lose a little weight that he gained while his back was injured. So I now have a real dieting companion. I had my sister before to diet with me and encourage each other, but she was, and still is, about as faithful to her diet as Bill Clinton is to his wife, so she wasn’t much help.         But now I have David! Yes! This is good for multiple reasons. For one, we have someone to commiserate with. For two, he can help me with weights and stuff, as he has a lot more experience with this kind of thing than I do. And for three, he really likes me. I’m basically his favorite sibling, no lie. So whenever he makes something, like a salad, he always makes some for me too! And we both love sushi, so he gets us that! I love it! It’s awesome!         So while this dieting thing is hard, it’s not healthy to always be looking on the bad side of things. And really, it’s not all bad. None of the food is terrible, I’m never that hungry, and now I have a buddy to keep me going. So when it comes right down to it, I’m losing weight and feeling great. I have a family who loves and supports me and the means by which to accomplish my goal. And that’s all you really need.   Running Sucks: Week Seven             So my dad wants to hike the Grand Canyon. I mean, the whole thing, top to bottom. He said that a guy from his work did it once and the hike from rim to rim took him twelve hours, and he is like, a professional hiker. He wants me and my sibs to come too. I think I’m going to die.             Personally, I think he’s doing this on purpose. He knows that all of us could stand to lose a few pounds (him and my brother excluded) and I think that he is using this as an excuse to get us off our butts. I mean, where did this passion for hiking come from? Since when were we an “outdoorsy” family? When was the last time I had an encounter with nature for an extended period of time that didn’t result in injury?             Don’t get me wrong, I love nature. That is, I love to admire nature from afar. A very, very far. I think it’s beautiful, and the Grand Canyon is no exception. I just don’t like the dirt and the sweat and the potential for tripping is waay too high for my liking, especially considering my history with coordination. My mom is the same way. The only difference is that she is allowed to not participate in these little “adventures”, whereas I am forced. I have no choice in the matter. But sooner or later, my dad will realize that I am about as good out in nature as Paris Hilton’s Chihuahua, and he will give up on me as well.             Unfortunately, this day has not come yet, so I will be hiking the Grand Canyon. On the bright side, he has given us time to get in shape. He wants to do it next April, as in a year from now. That means that I have twelve months to get my act together and become as hard core as dad’s hiker friend. I’m actually pretty stoked about this new motivation. Now I have something to really look forward to. Something that if I fail, I’ll hate my life and disappoint my dad. Something to keep me going and keep those cookies out of my mouth.             Besides, I really hate Chihuahuas. ]]> Thu, 16 Apr 2009 19:18:09 GMT