What is abuse?
There are different types of abuse. There is emotional, verbal, sexual, and physical abuse.
According to womensissues.com each year approximately one in five high school girls is physical or sexually abused by a dating partner.
Should teens be in a relationship while their still in high school? Teen relationships are a part of every high school scenario. But some teens are in abusive relationships.
A student at Journalism and Media Academy (JMA), Crystal Jemison, said, she thinks if teens are in relationships in high school they are “distracted.”
Michele Wiggins, JMA’s social worker, said she thinks that teen dating and romantic relationships are a reality in American high schools.
“Many (teenagers) will begin to form relationship habits and patterns that will lay the foundation of the rest of their lives,” Wiggins said.
Wiggins said that teenagers at JMA teens have come to her to talk about being abused by their partners.
“Sometimes they say that everyone perceives a (person) to be the perfect boyfriend but (in reality) that perfect boyfriend admits that he has choked his girlfriend behind closed doors. That ‘pretty girl’ who could have any guy she wants stays with a boy who shoved her or calls out her name (negatively) because she thinks she cannot do any better.”
Wiggins added that females are not always the only gender to be victimized, remembering a time she investigated an incident where a girl claimed her boyfriend hit her and it was found out that the girl hit the guy first.
According to womensissues.com, the warning signs of an abusive relationship might include someone who is controlling such as telling a person what to wear or where to go or whom to hang out with. A person who is being abused might think twice about expressing their thoughts or feelings and friends or family might warn them about this person because they are worry.
While interviewing a JM A female student and a former male Weaver High School student who now date but asked not to be identified, the girl admitted to being physically abuse by her boyfriend. The girl is 17 years-old but her boyfriend is 21 and has dropped out of high school. When Teens Today asked him why he hits her he said, “Because she don’t listen.” When she was asked how she felt when he did this to her she said, “I feel hurt when he hits me”.
She said she won’t tell anybody about this because she doesn’t want anything to happen to him. Her parents don’t like him because of his age.
Kellie Wagner an English teacher at JMA said she was a freshman in high school when she was in her first relationship. Wagner said, “I think teens should be in a relationship but if it at all turns violent or uncomfortable in any way the person needs to get out or get help.”
Wiggins advised teens to remember that not all abuse was psychical but that it could be verbal or emotional also.
“No one deserves to be hurt. No one deserves to be hit. No one deserves to be put down by someone they love,” Wiggins said.
JMA student Anthony Ortiz said it was “wrong” if a guy hit a girl.
“They both shouldn’t hit each other anyway. Show each other respect.”
One 14-year-old boy at JMA said he “would hit a girl” and believed it was ok to do so if “she messed up.”
Another 17-year-old boy said hitting people is not right even “if they do wrong.”
Kemar Downie, 17, said he has seen a boy “rough up” one girl because “she wasn’t listening.”
“I don’t think that it’s right,” he said.
Shunyce Davis, a JMA senior said she would never stand for any abusive behavior.
“A male putting their hands on me is out,” she said. “Don’t ever let a man tell you they love you if they are being abusive to you because it is a lie.”
So if you see someone getting abusive in your school or anywhere tell someone. And if you are in a abusive relationship get some help and talk to somebody about it like the police, family members, teachers or friends and you may need to consider counseling.