So after poor ratings in the first season, The X Factor will have to scale a mountain of Everest proportions to stick around and gnaw its way into the public’s favor down the line. Thankfully, I have some suggestions how best to do this.

Suggestion Number 1: Improve your seemingly irredeemable on-screen roster.

Unfortunately, Cheryl has made it clear she has zero interest in returning to either the UK or US version of the show, choosing instead to concentrate on her career, with a new name (no more Cole, understandably) and her album A Million Lights coming out June 18th.  With the two female judge spots now filled with people unqualified in their own way for the job, it seems the staff has a problem.

Solution? Find either a suitable replacement for the unnervingly stoic Reid, who is fine playing the Louis Walsh, play-second-fiddle-to-Cowell role with pride, or a presenter with more personality than Steve Jones (who was also fired after Season One), but not anyone overbearing like Nick Cannon or Ant and Dec.

Suggestion Number 2: Realize what you are and roll with it.

The main problem with the US X Factor is that it, like Idol but unlike the UK X Factor, takes itself far too seriously. Its problem is the same one The Voice has: it’s pretentious. The way to please the masses is to entertain them, and the best way to do that (get ready to get knocked off your high horse) is showing people who suck. Remembering many, if any, genuinely hilarious auditions from season one is a chore, although, admittedly, I had trouble remembering to watch after Cole was released. So, I took to YouTube to find some... and found none.

Suggestion Number 3: More obscure cities

This is actually a problem with the UK version as well.  While they added Liverpool for the first time last year, they go to the same places every year, which makes sense considering the UK isn’t that big. In America, however, there are many cities, and going to the cookie-cutter- contestant-filled cities like LA and Dallas all the time gets annoying.  To set themselves apart, The X Factor should experiment with fairly large cities where no one seems to go like Portland, Phoenix or Cincinnati.

Suggestion Number 4: Smile

It’s possible to take yourself seriously and still have a laugh, but finding more than a split second of footage showing the judges’ pearly whites is near impossible. If the panel were to turn their frowns upside down for just a moment, viewers will find them more appealing. As a poster in my middle school Spanish class read, “Smiles can change the world,” although in this case, smiles can change your standing in the Nielsen ratings.

Suggestion Number 5: Lessen the Overs age minimum

On the UK version the Overs category is 25 and up. The American version has it at 30 and up. In all honesty, there are probably a large number of voters who vote based on the mentor and not the contestant, which would explain why Cole won two of the three seasons she judged the UK version (not to take anything away from Alexandra Burke), and why Cowell, the man Americans love to hate, won with Melanie Amaro (again, not to detract from her obvious talent) over Scherzinger and Josh Krajcik.  If there wasn’t such a large discrepancy between the youngest boys and girls, it would give the Overs more of a chance, and possibly lessen the possibility of the mentor winning and not the contestant.

These are just a few things that FOX and Cowell should consider, and maybe, just maybe, The X Factor will last... but I doubt it.