I do not particularly envision myself as a couch potato, wasting away hours of my valuable life glued to a sofa cushion being hypnotized by violent television and video games. That all could change in an instant if I let myself become any more attached to the game Left 4 Dead, on Xbox 360. This is by far the best zombie game of the century, or however long video gaming has been in existence.
Since my vision is quite poor, I could not truly appreciate the incredible graphics until I reluctantly wore my glasses, something that is even rarer then spotting an abominable snowman skateboarding, but it was well worth it. Once I could see the endless amounts of infected ravenous corpses limping toward me, I knew my mission was to get my team to the safe room, where we would have time to reload our weapons, restore our health, and progress to the next dilapidated scene.
Aside from the normal decaying zombie hordes rushing at me and my teammates after being startled by car alarms or gun shots, there are five other threatening creatures lurking in the dark, waiting to take our lives.
The Tank, who carries the phrase, “All brawn and no brains,” to the tee, sends the ground trembling with his roars and stampeding. While he throws large objects from a distance and punches with brute force from short range, this steroid-infused zombie takes combinations of ammunition, agility, and sometimes fire to kill once and for all.
Another major threat is the Witch. Resembling an anorexic albino, she waits, isolated and weeping like a young girl, for the weary survivors to stumble onto her path.
At that point, she leaps at the closest person with incredible speed, scratching and ripping them apart until a teammate shoots her off.
The Hunter, another undead being, leaps through the cyber terrain with snarls and animalistic qualities. Dressed in all black with a slightly pointed hood, he waits for someone - anyone - to come into view so he can pounce on them, and tear apart their flesh, as observed with lions and other predators on Animal Planet.
Coughing and wheezing his way around the mysterious, dark turf, the Smoker launches his tongue at unsuspecting victims; strangling them until a teammate can release them from his grasp, or rather shoot him until he explodes into a dense cloud of smoke.
My favorite of the five main foes is an infected, oozing blob named Boomer. With an over-sized stomach and large blisters seeping with bacteria, almost like an over-baked Pillsbury Doughboy, he waddles into view and vomits on any surrounding survivors.
When I can hear the repulsive gargling sounds, and my screen is fogged up with thick green ooze, I know it is time to get prepared for the zombie horde, which is immensely attracted to the slime. I am not aware of why I favor this particular zombie over the other characters, but I do know that the animators and producers of this game are as creative and charismatic as they come, and have a tight grasp on my attention span, which usually runs frivolous throughout reality.
Aside from the interesting characters, Left 4 Dead’s interactive levels are the cyber world’s equivalent to Leonardo DaVinci’s Mona Lisa. Each equally exciting and intricate, the possibilities for personal attacks and strategies are endless.
I hope producers do the right thing in making a sequel, with double the territories and terrifying monsters for gamers to explore and conquer. I know I’ll be buying.
On a scale of one to 10, 10 being the highest in game quality and consumer approval, I award Left 4 Dead with a 10, without any hesitance.
This game is truly a thrilling sensory experience, and completely worth the purchasing price of $59.99. Now, if you will excuse me, I have prior engagements with one game controller, two assault rifles, three teammates, and thousands of zombies.