I remember during one of my classes, the teacher asked a question not many have been asked. “How many of you, by a show of hands, eat at least one time with your family a week?” a fraction of the class, including myself, raised their hand; about ten in a class of thirty.
The teacher modifies the question and asked again. How many of you usually eat with your family at the dinner table every day?”
I raised my hand, a quick glance around showed that I was alone, I did not lower my hand or fake the ever popular, “I was just stretching” routine.
I kept my hand raised high, for I was proud of the fact that I shared time with my family despite a sometimes hectic life. I was proud, but confused.
It might be a cultural thing, as a born Mexican I know our culture is defined by family closeness.
We have a need to stick together and travel in close groups; Sundays are family days that we dedicate to generally meet at our grandparent’s house and eat menudo, a traditional Mexican stew and later watch movies or a game of futbol (soccer), especially when our team Las Chivas, from my home city of Guadalajara plays.
But family togetherness has always been sewn in my cultural roots.
When I realized the scarcity of this I wondered why so many of my friends and students hardly shared a meal with their parents.
I realized then I was living in a country that is now governed by the fast food regime and busy work hours and little time mean that TV dinners and XBOX are becoming replacements for hours spent with parents. Kids spend more time nowadays with Ronald McDonald than their parents.
When I log on MySpace or messenger to check my messages I see some people that have been online and active for up to ten hours. I wonder if it is largely due to the internet that teens of today are more active in online communities sometimes more than they participate in real social life. I am not against internet social sites, but seriously, like alcohol ads say, “use intelligently and in moderation.”
It is a new culture borne of difficult work schedules for parents, I have seen while I have been at friend’s houses parents enter and leave for work sporadically.
Sometimes they come inside and greet us, gram a bite and leave for a second shift.
I have known friends who are left home alone for most of the week and seldom see both of their parents in the same room at once.
They pretend like “its no big deal” but I can see how much they truly need their parents, especially when they call you in the middle of the night to say they are bored and don’t know what to do because they slept the entire day and are not tired anymore. I call that a cry for attention.
I am lucky to have shared a complete family life, for students out there that hardly share a meal with their family, I would encourage them to try and bring everyone together to dinner when possible.
A meal spent together may not seem like a lot, but when high school students are so close to leaving their homes for college or work it is important to spend some time with the people you care about, because nothing lasts forever and in the blink of an eye you can come to regret or cherish your relation with the family, even if its not part of your culture, you can make your own.