Welcome back to The Bardvark! We know midterms were tough, but you survived to read the paper once more. As a congratulatory prize, we selected the best questions received this month--all sent by YOU!

Why are you not in the philosophy club?

Msteinhardt is often wrongfully accused of being interested in certain things "only because Dr. Clark likes them" (i,e. Oberlin College, Latin, etc). Therefore, she thinks it unwise to join a club whose purpose is to discuss philosophy--also known as Dr. Clark's undergraduate major. Furthermore, she has a job and other responsibilities. Smarlow agrees. Although he feels that philosophy is awesome, he just doesn't have the time for it.

Whenever I try studying at my desk, I get distracted easily. Actually, whenever I try to study at all, I get distracted easily. I'm falling behind on work and I'm stressed out. What do I do?

Msteinhardt knows how you feel. She also gets distracted easily when trying to study, but here are her tried-and-true methods for focusing! (1) Clean up your workspace. If you feel distracted, it could be because you are unorganized and your clutter demands your attention. An organized workspace is an organized life!

(2) Get enough sleep, and slow down on the caffeine. BHSEC students often underestimate the positive effects of a little less coffee and a little more shut-eye. Smarlow suggests you just get your work done and stop complaining! If you don't get it done, it becomes a self-fufilling prophecy of more work to do. And if all else fails, go to Dr. Matthews to figure out the meaning of life. Once you do that, you'll be so busy guest-starring on Oprah and writing self-help books that you won't even need to study!

How can we stop Pushing Daisies from being cancelled?

Smarlow thinks that this wonderful show should be watched by tens of millions of people. Sadly, middle America doesn't understand the appeal of a piemaker who solves mysteries by resurrecting dead people. It's a strange concept, considering our school's bizarre obsession with cupcakes, but it's true! The show is on the verge of being cancelled, so Smarlow suggests that you should watch it and send emails or letters to ABC! Keep Pushing Daisies on the air!!! Remember, kids: if you've got any more urgent questions, feel free to send them. We answer queries about anything, from senior citizen community outreach programs to your Halloween costume for next year! Have a great month and GO OBAMA!

Your fellow Bardians, Msteinhardt (Melanie.steinhardt@verizon.net) & Jmarlow (jmarlow94@gmail.com)