Want to know how the highlights staff manages to get through grueling hours of extreme journalism without dying? Yeah, we do too. Some of us claim that it’s due to the dedication of the writers to the paper. But that’s not it—at least, not really. Call me biased, but I tend to think that it’s because of my “Crack Cookies”. They’re good. End of story. Okay, maybe not good. More like life-altering, miraculous pieces of heaven that are kept secret for the greater good of the world… Kidding. They’re just good.

Ingredients:

•

1 box of Betty Crocker sugar cookie mix

•

1 large egg

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½ cup of olive oil

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1 bag of peanut M&M’s (can be substituted by regular M&M’s, or any other candy covered chocolate)

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1 Hersheys dark chocolate bar (can be substituted by any chocolate bar)

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Any other kind of yummy snack you may want in your cookies. I don’t advise you to throw in Skittles, or Twizzlers, or anything that won’t melt. I hope you can figure out why.

Steps:

1.

Preheat the oven to 375º F, unless you want raw cookie dough. In that case, just skip this step.

2.

Open the cookie mix place it in a large bowl. Now, you know those lovely instructions on the back of the box? Do me a favor and disregard those for the most part. Instead of adding one stick of butter, you’re going to add the ½ cup of olive oil. (I know, I know, but trust me.) Add the egg, and beat the mixture until smooth.

3.

Do you know the archetype to the number three? It means completion, wholeness, and perfection. This is my favorite step because it is when the mediocre cookie mix is elevated to a whole new level. Take the candy covered chocolates, and the chocolate bars, and whatever else you may have chosen to put in these little babies, and do so. I’m serious, just throw everything in there, and mix it up.

4.

Now the rest is pretty simple. Spoon the cookies onto an ungreased cookie sheet. (That is, if you don’t want to eat the dough. If you do, and it tastes a little funny, it is the olive oil. Bake them and all will be well.)

5.

Place them in the oven for nine to eleven minutes, and take them out.

6.

EAT! EAT! EAT!

PS- I hope you realized by now that there is no crack in Jess’s Crack Cookies. I am not an advocate of drugs, but I’m sure if you sprinkle some “powdered sugar” on them, they will be just dandy.