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Tribal Tribune Wando High School Mt Pleasant, SC
Issue Date: Friday, February 02, 2007 Issue: January 2007
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At-a-glance

Mission possible: Student taught lasting lessons by mother’s fortitude
WHEELS OF FATE: Senior Alex Brush learned from his mother to never allow destiny to be determined for him. (Photo Alexander Brush/provided) -
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“Impossible.”

That is the one cold, emotionless word the specialists working with my mother after her life-changing automobile accident used to respond to her inquiry over whether or not she would ever be able to live independently again. According to these specialists, she would never be able to drive, be a mother, or even move by herself again.

My mother has been a quadriplegic for the past 21 years, and she has made a profession of disproving doctors’ assumptions.

Do the math: she has been disabled for 21 years: I am 17. She drives a specially adapted minivan, and, she moves freely and independently in a wheelchair she pushes herself.

Luckily for all of us, my mom is quite hard-headed, so she chose not to listen to her fate as it was read down to her by her doctors; she has done all they have said she could not do and more.

More than being hard-headed, she just does not quit.

In addition to ignoring multiple doctors’ orders, she has also done the impossible by being a single mother. Although most are unwilling to believe my parents divorced purely based on the fact they had many irreconcilable differences, the accident probably kept them together longer than they would have been; a good thing, because otherwise, I wouldn’t be here. They divorced when I was in the second grade, and my mother had, and has the task of raising me, while my father had only visitation responsibilities. However, he too had an active role in my parenting.

And again, most people are shocked to learn this: my mother has been more involved in my life than the average student’s parent. She has driven me to swimming meets all over the state, watched my pitiful attempts at basketball, cheered me on in baseball, traveled with me on band trips, and been a chaperone on numerous field trips. More tender memories than embarrassing myself in front of her during competitions include shooting hoops and playing badminton with her in the driveway. My only real complaint in the parenting department is that her idea of cooking is to drive down to Publix and purchase a rotisserie chicken. Besides that, she makes it her job to be a better mother than anyone out there.

All the while, she served as a transportation consultant acting as an advisor for accessibility. Although she enjoyed this job, she claims her greatest personal accomplishments aside from raising me and remarrying with a very patient man include working as a volunteer in the community and the state, speaking in front of national audiences and becoming a published writer. She loves to see public institutions build ramps and become accessible because it is the right thing to do, not because of just another federal mandate. She puts it best: “Though I’ve had numerous architectural barriers removed, I am infinitely more satisfied with moving attitudinal barriers,” she said.

People talk about success stories. My mother is one.

Throughout my entire tenure as her son, I have never heard her complain about her fate as a person with a disability. She never feels sorry for herself, and that is the one thing I think separates her from everybody else.

My mom worked harder than most people in physical therapy too; when a trainer told her to do 10 arm lifts, she would do 20. She realized her disadvantage, ignored it and moved on. She admits that all of her hard work was indeed hard work. For an entire year, she had to rely on others to do simple tasks like bathing, dressing and transportation back and forth from physical therapy. After this year of being completely dependent, she realized how much work it was going to take to get where she wanted to be. She set up a strenuous physical regimen and stuck to it for the remaining four years of therapy.

During these five years, she learned how to maneuver a wheelchair up and down stairs, get up off the floor in case she fell, cook, drive, and she even got certified in Scuba diving. In other words, she reached her goal- she became independent.

My mother also was able to remarry; like most others who meet her, my step-dad was able to look past the physical disability and see her for who she is.

She says laughter is what saved her for depression and self-defeat. Thank God for Bill Cosby. There are many people who are strong, but my mom can match wills with anyone. This miracle of scientific rebellion and will-power is an inspiration to all who meet her, and I am thankful to be so “unfortunate” as to have a “crippled, dependent” mother.

To steal from a popularized Adidas commercial, “Impossible is nothing.”

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