This is a piece I hope to turn into a peaceful periodical for your pursuing pleasure. In this section of newsprint, I will choose a noun (most likely an event) and decipher the pros and cons surrounding the aforementioned noun. For the first of these OPINION articles, I will be looking at the festive gathering of Thanksgiving since it is still fresh in the minds of most students.

My experience with Thanksgiving has always been a joyous one, so this will be a positive exposition.

Pro: Thanksgiving means you get to stuff your face with food!

Almost everyone in the middle to upper class enjoys some type of tradition when it comes to Thanksgiving. The most prominent of these being the buying and cooking of lavish meals that takes the whole family to enjoy. In my particular case, my father and all his siblings are phenomenal cooks. Therefore when my dad announced HE would be cooking the Thanksgiving feast, my aunt called him out saying that SHE wanted to cook it. I was at school at the time, but I like to imagine my dad and aunt fighting in gladiatorial combat, locked in an epic battle to decide who got to slave over a hot stove! Of course both my dad and my aunt are big people and older than 43, so I doubt this is what actually happened.

However, regardless of my imaginary family traditions, over the previous weekend, many students ate very real turkey stuffed with only somewhat imaginary stuffing. No matter how or what your family prepares for the table, food is an integral part of Thanksgiving.

Con: Thanksgiving is built on a throne of lies!

I am not about to claim that I know everything about Thanksgiving. What I will say is that I have severe doubts as to the validity of the Pilgrim myth. Anyone who has been through first grade has made the hand turkey and then listened as the teacher wove a magical tale of Pilgrims and Indians joining together for a day. First off, by the time Columbus had made his third voyage to the New World, he did not have a strong working relationship with the Native Americans. By the time the Pilgrims flocked to start life in the strange new land, they too did not think fondly of the Indians, nor did the Indians think fondly of them. It is my educated guess that the original Thanksgiving was an annual celebration of a harvest and another year of surviving the harsh American climate. While the story of the Plymouth Colony receiving help from their Native neighbors may be true, it does make eating the turkey slightly harder knowing that Thanksgiving might be more myth than meal.

Pro: Four days off from school!

Who does not enjoy a good break from the hassle of school? Even teachers have to have family and friends to share the joyous season together. One of the best parts about Thanksgiving is the time to relax and spend time with your family. During my break, I hung out with my best friend, played a prank on my sister’s boyfriend, and bought a limited edition My Little Pony plush toy. (That’s right, PLUSH!) Another boon to the holiday season is sleeping in after the feast and the wonderful battle that is Black Friday. The shopping day I will now forever associate with that driveling excuse of a song “Friday” by the equally annoying Rebecca Black. It is my sincerest hope that everyone had a good time and hopefully their families got along if only for a short while.

Con: Thanksgiving costs a lot and is a marketing invention.

Not to stomp on your parade, but Thanksgiving is an invention of turkey farmers and global conglomerates. Now maybe the first few get-togethers were sincere in their belief that it was a season to be thankful, but as soon there was money to be made, big businesses commercialized Thanksgiving. Ever notice how eggnog only comes out at the holiday season and you are wrong if you don’t show your festive spirit by buying a turkey at $1.29 a pound? The problem is the teenager in me wants to enjoy a celebration of family, but the economist in me knows that the only reason Thanksgiving is popular is because someone asked, “What small-time festivity can we exploit between Halloween and Christmas?” Not to offend anyone, but I think of Thanksgiving as a time to be thankful, not celebrating a bunch of frostbitten British people who managed to survive a very nippy winter.

Pro: You get to spend time with family!

I love my family. After God, my family is the most important thing to me, followed by my Xbox 360, my bed, my trademark purple coat and finally my friends on certain occasions. Thanksgiving is a magical time where even my dysfunctional family can join together for the sake of being grateful. I don’t pretend to live in a world free of broken families, but in my experience you and your family should put aside petty differences, especially if your 70-year-old grandma is in the room!

Con: You HAVE to spend time with your family.

I love my family. In the small bite-size increments I see them in between school and sleep, but no matter how much I love them, my family cannot fully comprehend the awesomeness that is Robert Stephens. I do not know if everyone’s family is like mine, but I know all my friends have some form of sibling rivalry or parental conflict. People can’t spend all their time with someone, otherwise they would go insane and not in the fun way. I am truly thankful that Thanksgiving only happens twice a year.

This has been the first of Robert’s reflections; I hope you enjoyed my myriad of monochromatic musings and feel free to contact the Timberline and send us your thoughts. With this year’s Thanksgiving gone, I remember what I am thankful for. I am thankful for my health, my family, my friends, and the fact I get to share my opinion with the whole school. I hope everyone looks forward to the Christmas season, because I know I will.